Chapter 15
Saturday January 23, 1813 – Pemberley
Richard Fitzwilliam alighted from his carriage to greet Georgiana and Darcy who had come out, despite the cold, to greet him. They hurried him inside and, after the usual greetings, he retired to his room to refresh himself and change his clothes. An hour later he joined them in the music room where Georgiana was practicing.
“I am glad you decided to break your journey at Pemberley, Richard. Where are you bound?” Darcy asked.
“London. I have some business with headquarters there. I thought I would take the opportunity to visit with you and Georgiana for a day or two. I have to depart on Monday.”
Darcy looked at his cousin carefully and wondered how much he was not saying. He knew that Fitzwilliam expected to be called back to duty. He would not press the matter now but later, yes. He raised an eyebrow at his cousin and replied, “We are pleased that you decided to do so.”
“We have someone else that we expect to break his journey with us today.” Georgiana mentioned. “Mr. Bingley is returning to York from London and we expect him later today.”
Fitzwilliam glanced at Darcy, “How is he coming along? I remember you telling me that he had grown up quite a bit in the past year.”
“He stopped here on his way to town about a fortnight ago. It is astonishing, the change in him. He has gone from boy to man almost overnight. He has become much more engaged in business activities with a consequent reduction in idleness and frivolity. I admit I am pleased to see it. I like the new Bingley very much.” Darcy replied.
Georgiana tentatively offered, “I had not seen Mr. Bingley for quite a while. The change is marked and I very much like what he has become.”
Fitzwilliam and Darcy exchanged glances and Fitzwilliam’s raised eyebrow was noted by Darcy who gave a slight nod to his cousin. “Obviously another topic for discussion with Darcy” thought Fitzwilliam.
The three cousins spent a relaxed hour before dinner discussing estate issues, tenant problems, spring planting plans and planned renovations to Pemberley. None of the topics were of pressing urgency and both Darcy and his cousin were content to let the conversation embrace such non-contentious issues. The avoidance of mention of military matters was by a mutual, unstated agreement between both men.
Bingley’s carriage rolled up to the front entrance of Pemberley just as they all sat down for dinner. Quickly rising from the table, Darcy and Georgiana hurried to greet Bingley as he was ushered into the front hall.
“Welcome Charles, I hope your journey was not too cold.”
“Thank you Darcy, I am afraid it was bitterly cold for the last hour or so. Greetings Miss Darcy, it is a pleasure to see you again so soon,”
After Bingley divested himself of outerwear, Darcy began to lead him toward the dining room, and said, “we are just starting dinner. Would you like to refresh yourself before eating? We can easily wait another quarter hour.”
Bingley immediately accepted and headed to his usual room. Before he had climbed too many stairs, Darcy mentioned that they had another guest his cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam which delighted Bingley since he and the Colonel had always enjoyed each other’s company.
A scant quarter hour later, a refreshed but tired Bingley joined the Darcys and Fitzwilliam for dinner. It was a simple meal, held in the small family dining room. The talk was deliberately light-hearted, with Fitzwilliam delighting Georgiana with tales of the antics of his nieces and nephews while visiting at his parents’ home. He also passed on an announcement, “You will most likely get a letter from my sister, announcing that she is with child again. I think her confinement is in June.”
“Marvellous news, Richard. Marvellous news! I suppose your mother is making more noises about getting you married so that you can provide more grandchildren,” teased Darcy.
Fitzwilliam laughed, “I believe she mentioned the subject once or twice.”
Once the meal was finished they decided to settle in the music room as Georgiana offered to play some pieces that she was developing. The men sat quietly sipping port and relaxing to the music flowing from Georgiana’s fingers. After about an hour she stopped and excused herself, indicating a desire to retire to her rooms to read before sleep.
Darcy invited the others to the library where a fire was warming the room. He poured himself a brandy, sat in one of the chairs ringing the fireplace, and invited the other two men to help themselves. Fitzwilliam also took a brandy, but Darcy noted with interest that Bingley poured himself a whiskey.
“Whiskey, Bingley? That is new.”
“I have acquired a taste for it over the last few months. I am getting some excellent whiskey from Scotland now.”
"Dare I ask how your efforts in London went?” Noting Fitzwilliam’s questioning look, Darcy explained a bit further: ”Bingley has decided to move to York and sold his London house. He had to help relocate the Hursts and Caroline.”
“Actually, the Hursts acquired their own house with little help from me. I did pay part of the cost since Caroline will be living with them. I cannot say how long that arrangement will last. Caroline is still not reconciled to my departure. They live in a respectable neighbourhood. Not of the first tier as Caroline would wish for, but respectable. The Hursts appear content, at least.”
“Charles, I had thought I might visit you later this year. I have no fixed plans as yet but I would like to meet this remarkable uncle of yours. He seems to have done more for you in a couple of months than I did in years.” Darcy said.
Bingley thought for a minute or two and replied, “I would be delighted to have you visit. May or June would be the opportune times although, truthfully, it does not matter a great deal.” He thought a bit more and suggested, “There are a number of people that you might be interested in meeting. The investment opportunities in the north have much potential.”
“That sounds quite intriguing; I will consider my plans. Right now I have to deal with the spring planting in April and visit my aunt in Kent.”
Looking at Fitzwilliam, Darcy hesitated and then asked, “Richard, will you be accompanying me this year?”
Fitzwilliam grimaced and shook his head. “As I suspected, you have already guessed that I will be returning to active duty. I received word several days ago and told my family. I hardly need say that they want me to resign my commission and marry. The problem is simply that I have not found the woman, with the necessary dowry, that I would want to live with for the next forty years.”
He took another sip of his brandy and sighed, “I have seen too many unhappy or unsatisfied marriages to want to take that risk or burden.”
“When do you report?”
“Wellesley is in winter quarters in Portugal as we speak. My regiment will be sailing at the end of the month to join him. It will take me every minute there is between now and then to get the regiment ready.”
“Georgiana and I had planned to travel to London on Wednesday next. I am sure we could accompany you on Monday instead.”
Fitzwilliam thought and nodded his head. “That sounds like an excellent idea. I will return my father’s carriage and travel with you.”
“Richard, do you want to break the news to Georgiana or shall I? It is possible that she has guessed already.”
“”Let me do it. It won’t be any better coming from you than me but she deserves to hear it from me.”
“Fine, I suggest you tell her after church services tomorrow. I will let her know before breakfast of the change in travel plans.”
Bingley had sat quietly throughout this discussion, finally rising to his feet and stretching. “I am tired enough from the travel and the whiskey will help me sleep. I will refresh my glass and head up to my room now before I fall asleep in this chair.”
Darcy and Fitzwilliam bade him good-night and settled down in comfortable silence with their brandy. Darcy broke the silence, “Do you remember that comment Georgie made about Bingley during your arrival? Well it appears that they had an interesting conversation about a fortnight ago when Bingley stopped here on his way to London. The crux of the matter is that Bingley asked her to save him a dance set at her ‘coming out’ ball. Mrs. Annesley, who was present for the entire conversation, saw nothing improper between them but she also suspects that each became aware of the other as a possible suitor. She believes, and it is agreed, that there is nothing to alarm us since they will be in each other's company only rarely and that dance is over a year in the future. However, it seems I must consider Bingley’s suitability as a suitor.”
Fitzwilliam had sat up straight when Darcy mentioned ‘suitor’ but then a thoughtful expression crossed his face as he responded, “You know, he might be a very good suitor if he has grown as much as you believe. I don’t give much credence to concerns about ‘trade’ if the man is a gentleman. I like Bingley quite a bit.”
“I agree. I won’t discourage his suit should he decide to press it but Georgie will have at least one season before she chooses to marry. That should let her consider the men available.”
Fitzwilliam considered Darcy overtly and decided to probe an issue that they had not talked about for months. “Tell me Cousin, what are your plans or intentions with regard to Miss Elizabeth Bennet?”
Darcy looked over at Fitzwilliam with a surprised look on his face. “Are you taking up mind-reading, Richard?”
He smiled and continued, “This has been much on my mind recently. I have determined to visit Hertfordshire and call on her. I have several engagements and business in town that I must take care of first, but I am determined to call. I cannot go on in this state of uncertainty. I must know, once and for all, if there is a chance I can win her.”
“I am glad to hear that, Cousin. I think she is too sensible a woman to still bear you a grudge, but I do think you must be completely honest with her. And for heaven’s sake, think before you speak. If your first thoughts are for her well-being, I do not see how she can refuse you.”
“Let’s to bed, Cousin, I have a lot to do tomorrow, if we are to leave two days early.”
Chapter 16
Sunday, January 24, 1813 - Pemberley
Darcy was up early as was his habit and immediately sent a note to Georgiana’s maid advising her of the change in plans and the need to begin packing for the trip to London. His own manservant, Hawkins, had been advised the previous night of the change in plans, Darcy had a number of letters to write and meetings with his steward before he could depart and he did not expect to have much free time today. Meetings that had been scheduled for Monday and Tuesday would now have to be completed this afternoon. He also had to ensure that the carriage was checked and travel arrangements changed at the two stops along the route.
Realizing that his work had reduced the time available to get ready for church services, a small breakfast was brought to his room for him to eat while getting ready. As a result, he was waiting in the front hall for the others to arrive. Once they reached the chapel, Darcy and Fitzwilliam unobtrusively ensured that Georgiana and Bingley did not sit together.
After lunch, Georgiana went to the music room to work on several pieces that she was practicing. Colonel Fitzwilliam had gone to the library after lunch but, upon hearing the sound of the piano, went in search of Georgiana. Finding her, he was quite contented to sit unobserved while she practiced. Finally, after a particularly good effort on one of the more difficult pieces, he applauded her heartily which quite caught Georgiana by surprise.
Fitzwilliam knew it would not get any easier if he waited to impart the news that he was going to Portugal but wanted to do so as gently as possible. Rising to his feet, he said, “Georgie, do you realize that I have not visited the conservatory for several years? I would like to see it again. Will you accompany me?”
Georgiana was agreeable and arm-in-arm they strolled to and into the conservatory. Fitzwilliam maintained a steady flow of light conversation as they walked. When they arrived at a spot with benches for sitting, he sat down and invited Georgiana to sit beside him. He took her hand and spoke in a very matter-of-fact voice, “Georgie, I am sure you have a suspicion of my news but I wanted to tell you myself. Headquarters has given me my orders and I am taking my regiment to join Wellesley in Portugal. I leave at the end of the month. I know that you, along with the rest of my family, do not wish for me to go but I am bound by honour and duty to serve my country. I can make no promises about my safety but I value my life and the lives of the men I lead. I risk neither their lives nor mine unnecessarily.”
Fitzwilliam could see her distress, “What troubles you so, Georgie? You know I have seen active duty before and always returned, I will do so again. I plan to dance at your wedding and I insist right now you save the third set for me. I will allow your new husband the right to the first set and won’t deprive your brother of the second, but the third is mine. Understood?”
Giving her a quick hug, he teased some more, “Now, if I am to be a proper guardian, I need to know your wishes in terms of a husband. Who and what should we look for in your husband? Short? Fat? Scottish with a brogue you could cut with a knife? Old? You really must help your brother and me to sort through all the candidates and let us know your preferences.”
“Richard, I don’t want to even think about marriage right now.” Georgiana replied trying to stifle a giggle, “And certainly not about a short, fat, old Scotsman.” And she gave a delicate shudder.
“Nonsense, my girl. All young ladies think about potential husbands. Come, come …confess it now, what does he look like? Tall, perhaps? Dark hair? A bit of a fop? An Earl, at the very least?”
Georgiana giggled, “No, No ….. Well, perhaps tall, anyway.”
“You need to help me a little more, Georgie. You have only eliminated two out of three men in England. That still leaves me with a very, very large crowd. If he must have a title, that can reduce the numbers quite a bit. There cannot be that many men with a title, can there?” The last was uttered rather plaintively by Fitzwilliam.
Georgiana hesitated slightly. She found this teasing to be slightly uncomfortable and decided to hedge her answer, “A title would be nice I suppose, but hardly necessary.” She paused and then, more seriously, responded, “I think I want a good man. With such examples as you and my brother, I could hardly settle for less, now could I?”
“Ah….you are not playing fair, Georgie. Be careful what you wish for. You could get my visage and your brother’s manners.”
“Oh, my brother’s manners are not so bad.” Georgiana replied attempting to control a smile.
Fitzwilliam laughed, “Minx!”
They both fell silent for several minutes and then Fitzwilliam looked at Georgiana, “I may not be home in time for your first ball but if I am, I want the second set. Promise?”
“I promise! It is yours!”
Fitzwilliam went over to her and gave her a hug, saying “I will write as often as I can but the post service is rather poor when people are fighting. I hope you will write to me often. I will be in London for about three weeks before I depart. I expect to be very busy but will make an effort to see you several times before I leave.”
They both started at the sound of a cough and turned to see Bingley standing on the pathway.
“I hope I am not intruding?”
“Not at all, "responded Fitzwilliam. “I was just getting Georgie to tell me what she wants in a suitor when she is of age to have such. So far we have only determined that she does not want a short, fat, old Scotsman with a heavy brogue.”
“Does anyone want such a man?” chuckled Bingley as he sat down. He had been standing on the path for several minutes watching and considering Georgiana before making his presence known. He was more and more impressed with her. He knew she was obviously still too young to consider marriage and he himself was not ready either; but he could see no reason not to cultivate her acquaintance as a friend and thus keep himself in her attention.
“Miss Darcy, I have been living in York for several months now and have yet to hear your equal on the pianoforte. Could you oblige me with a little music?”
“I would be happy to do so.” Saying which, Georgiana led the way back to the music room and began playing some lively Scottish and English ballads. After playing for an hour, she excused herself claiming a desire to rest. The two gentlemen continued to talk in a desultory manner until Bingley suggested a game of billiards, which claimed their attention until it was time to prepare for dinner.
Dinner itself was a quiet affair, as was the remainder of the evening, which most spent reading and completing their preparations to depart at first light in the morning.
Sunday January 24, 1813 – Gracechurch Street, London
Jane was trying to remember the last time she had been as content – happy perhaps – as she did at this moment. Captain Stovall had been courting her officially for a fortnight and she had been in his presence almost every day that he was not in Portsmouth. Oddly enough, while some of that time his attention was directed to the Gardiner children or to the Gardiners themselves, that had not lessened the pleasure she took in his company. She could not remember now if she ever had talked with Mr. Bingley as she talked with Amos – for she was beginning to think of him as Amos now. They had talked about his years at sea, her time in Hertfordshire and some of their hopes for the future. She was getting to know the man and she approved of him very much. His comfortable play with the children – and he had become a favourite with them – bode well for a future in which they had children. Her mind came to a lurching stop – they had children. Was she…had she already arrived at a decision, should he offer marriage? She blushed and looked quickly at his face as he walked beside her. Yes! Should he ask, she would be very happy to accept.
Captain Stovall was equally contented with one small niggling concern. He believed strongly that the woman on his arm was one he would delight to call his wife. She had a good heart, a kind heart, a loving heart and a strong, sensible approach to life. But he must know if some part of that heart still belonged to another man. He was determined to speak and this seemed as good a time as any.
“Miss Bennet! I am going to ask what most people would consider a very improper question. You see, the first evening I dined with you and your family, Mr. Gardiner and I had a short discussion over port after the meal. His sole concern was for your well-being and he intimated that your affections had been engaged by the particular attentions of a gentleman who then left without making an offer, which caused you considerable distress. Mr. Gardiner considered the gentleman’s behaviour somewhat dishonourable and wanted to prevent a reoccurrence. I was most willing to provide such assurances. My question is simply this, Miss Bennet – Is your heart unattached?”
Jane’s feet simply stopped working as she came to a complete stop and looked up at him in some amazement. By stopping, she had forced Captain Stovall to partially turn and face her. She continued to gaze at him for a few more seconds and then, reaching a decision, forced them both to resume walking.
“Captain Stovall, you promised me honesty, when you offered a courtship. I find myself unable to be anything less. The gentleman, Mr. Bingley – I see no reason to hide his name, since you will likely learn it should you meet my mother – was quite handsome and amiable. He most assuredly engaged my affections and I certainly believed myself to be falling in love with him. Then he left, promising to return but did not. I was hurt - hurt and very confused - for months. I learned that he had been convinced by friends and relatives to leave because of my poor connections, some impropriety of my mother and younger sisters, a lack of dowry and a belief that I was only interested in him because of his wealth. My hurt and pain gradually turned to anger. Anger that he knew me so poorly as to believe such of me. Now…..even the anger is gone. If I were to meet Mr. Bingley tomorrow, it would be as an acquaintance…..no more. The only person in Longbourn to now regret his departure is my mother and her lamentations do nothing more than cause me irritation.”
Jane turned her face to look directly at the Captain, raised an eyebrow and smiled, “So Captain, if I have not answered your actual question, I have, I think, been honest in answering the implied question, have I not?”
He stopped turned to face her and taking her hands in his bestowed a kiss on each, saying, “Yes, Miss Bennet, you most certainly have.” Then turning to walk once again, he settled her hand on his arm, placed his other hand over hers and intertwined their fingers. “She did not say her heart was unattached, only that it was not attached to this Bingley. Excellent!”
In this fashion, they continued to stroll through the park until recalled by Elizabeth’s reminder that dinner was approaching. Elizabeth was quite amused by Jane’s absorption in the Captain and the pleasure expressed on her countenance. She was convinced that removal from her mother’s profusions and manipulation had allowed Jane to display her feelings more openly since she no longer had cause to guard the expression of those feelings.
She thought back to the past two weeks during which they had gone to the play Twelfth Night, walked in Hyde Park and attended a dinner party; society enough to satisfy even her desire for company. A grin crossed her face when she considered the night they went to see the play. While she had chosen to wear a relatively modest evening gown, Jane had selected one that was rather more daring. It was deep blue with simple, classic lines and a v-neck which displayed the upper portion of her breasts. She looked absolutely stunning which described the look on the Captain’s face when Jane descended the stairs in the Gardiner house. He hardly took his eyes off her on the ride to the theatre and, once there, was the first to exit the carriage. Turning, he offered his hand to help Elizabeth descend and then offered his hand to Jane who, grasping his hand with her own stepped out of the carriage bending forward slightly as she did so. The Captain’s intake of air was quite noticeable and a blush spread over both his and Jane’s countenance. Only Elizabeth noticed the small smile of pleasure on Jane’s lips.
After Mr. Gardiner assisted his wife out of the carriage, the party moved slowly through the crowd. After divesting themselves of their outerwear, they moved into the intermission area. Jane quickly attracted surreptitious and admiring glances from many of the men. Captain Stovall did not appear to mind at all, satisfied to be the man escorting her to the play. Several couples known to the Gardiners approached and were introduced but Mr. Gardiner and the Captain were persistent in moving their party forward and towards their seats.
Once seated, Elizabeth had enjoyed and attended the play so closely that she had little attention left for the rest of party. While it was not one of her preferred Shakespeare's histories, it was so well acted that she was lured in almost despite herself. Captain Stovall was completely enraptured, repeating several times that seeing the words come to life on a stage gave new meaning to them. He vowed that he would make every effort to see another play before his time onshore ended.
Returning home, they had partaken of a light tea after which Captain Stovall made ready to leave. Elizabeth and Jane accompanied him to the front door and, Elizabeth having deliberately stepped several paces back to give them some privacy, he turned and took Jane’s hand, saying, “I thought tomorrow I might visit a bookstore. Would you and Elizabeth wish to accompany me?” Upon receiving her agreement, he raised her hand and turned it, pressing a kiss to the palm of her hand causing a small gasp by Jane. A pleased smile graced his face as he murmured, “I will call at ten then, Miss Bennet.”
Elizabeth had teased her sister quite thoroughly afterwards and was now only wondering when the good Captain would offer for Jane. Her sister’s affections were no longer in doubt. The pleasure she received from his attentions left little doubt Captain Stovall’s suit would be successful. The only issue lay in when he would make his offer.
Chapter 17
Thursday, January 28, 1813 – London
Darcy stepped down from his carriage in front of the Johnson home. It was a fairly modern, four story building somewhat smaller than his own house and located in one of the better sections of the city. His arrival must have been anticipated because the butler had the door open before he reached it. Recognizing Darcy immediately, he bowed and then motioned a footman to take Darcy’s hat and cloak saying, “Mr. and Mrs. Johnson are with the other guests in the drawing room, Mr. Darcy.” He led Darcy there and opened the doors, waiting for Darcy to pass through. Darcy paused in the doorway to assess the people within the room. With a quick scan, he recognized two couples, apart from the Johnsons, that were known to him.
He saw his presence was recognized as Mr. Johnson moved quickly towards him. “Mr. Darcy, welcome.” he said in a quiet voice. “As ever, we are pleased you could join us tonight.”
“How could I pass up the opportunity for fine food and fine conversation? I welcomed your invitation.”
“There are several people that I would particularly like to introduce to your acquaintance tonight, Mr. Darcy.”
“By all means, Mr. Johnson but I would like to greet my hostess first, if I may.”
“Certainly, sir. She is sitting over there.” Saying which Mr. Johnson led Darcy to Mrs. Johnson with whom he then chatted for several minutes. Seeing Mr. Johnson’s slight impatience, Darcy smiled and let himself be led away. For a quarter hour, Mr. Johnson guided him to several gentlemen and their wives, effecting introductions and their connection to Mr. Johnson.
Looking around Mr. Johnson said, “There is one more gentleman that I would most particularly like to make known to you. I have only become acquainted with him in the last six months or so. He has made it possible for me to expand my production by his access to markets in other countries. It has truly been fortuitous for me.” Saying this, he led Darcy towards a gentleman who was talking to several young ladies as well as a woman and a gentleman only a few years older than Darcy himself.
As they approached the group, the young ladies turned in response to a slight nod from the gentleman facing Darcy. His shock was total. He heard Johnson speaking but he could not understand the words. All he could see was her face. He wondered if his was as pale.
“Mr. Darcy, are you all right, sir?”
He grasped the remnants of his self control, essayed a small smile and replied, “Perfectly, sir. I was simply caught totally by surprise.” And, looking directly at Elizabeth, “A most pleasant surprise!”
Johnson was not sure what exactly had happened but obviously Mr. Darcy was known to at least one of the Gardiner party. He pressed on, “Mr. Darcy, may I make known to you Mr. Edward Gardiner, Mrs. Madeline Gardiner, Captain Stovall and Mr. Gardiner’s nieces, Miss Jane Bennet and Miss Elizabeth Bennet. Ladies, gentlemen, allow me to introduce Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy, who is from Derbyshire.”
Darcy bowed and spoke quickly, “I had the very great please of meeting the Miss Bennets in Hertfordshire while visiting a friend there. It is a pleasure to meet you both once again. Mr. Gardiner, Mrs Gardiner, I am pleased to make your acquaintance also. I seem to remember hearing Miss Elizabeth speak fondly of you both.”
Mr. Gardiner responded, since both of his nieces seemed to have lost the power of speech, “Elizabeth has spoken of you also, Mr. Darcy.”
Darcy raised an eyebrow and, glanced at Elizabeth, before looking at Mr. Gardiner and replying “That was most equivocal, Sir. But I suspect she treated me most justly.”
He could feel Elizabeth searching his face. He turned to Jane and asked, “Miss Bennet, I trust your family are all well?”
"Yes, Mr. Darcy, my family in Hertfordshire are indeed all well.”
"How long have you been in London?”
“Our aunt and uncle visited us at Longbourn over Christmas and we returned with them a few days later.”
Darcy continued to become acquainted with the other members of the party and had just discovered that Mrs. Gardiner had ties to Derbyshire when conversation was cut short by the announcement that dinner was to be served and everyone began to move towards the dining room. Darcy had hopes of acquiring a seat close to Elizabeth and was only partially successful. Her place was on the other side of the table and offset by two other people. Fortunately, he could observe her and hear parts of her conversation. The uncertainty that had begun to plague him – that both his memories and love of Elizabeth were fading – was gone. He found that his admiration and longing were as strong now as they ever were, and possibly stronger. He wanted nothing more than to simply look and admire her.
"I must attend, I must behave in a civil manner with those around me.” It took a conscious effort to begin to talk with the people on either side of him. He hoped he was not appearing too distracted but he knew his eyes were constantly shifting to look at Elizabeth. Mrs. Gardiner had taken the seat next to him which provided him with the opportunity to talk with her about Derbyshire and gaze at Elizabeth, who was sitting almost directly across from her aunt, with, he hoped, discretion. Having spent many years prior to her marriage in Lambton Mrs. Gardiner knew Derbyshire well and had also toured Pemberley and its grounds several times. Through her conversation, she had quickly impressed him as a genteel, elegant and intelligent lady and it was obvious that she had been a positive influence on the two eldest Bennet sisters. Good manners required Darcy to pay some attention to the lady on his other side and, after several attempts to discover a topic of mutual interest, he was able to engage her in talk about her charitable work which attempted to provide some education to children in impoverished areas. He could not help but be impressed with her dedication and enthusiasm as she expounded on the various projects that were underway, and was not reluctant to promise financial support to her efforts.
Turning to talk again with Mrs. Gardiner, he saw Elizabeth gazing at him. He gave a small nod of his head and a slight smile and was gratified to have it returned. His attention was then captured by Mrs. Gardiner who had begun to talk with the gentleman sitting across from him – a Captain Stovall, who Darcy now remembered as part of the Gardiner party. From Mrs. Gardiner’s comments, Darcy realized he was a naval captain and asked, “Are you between commands, Captain?”
"No, Mr.Darcy. My ship is in sad shape and laid up being repaired. I probably will not get back into the war until the summer.”
“The navy has borne a huge portion of the war burden so far and we all owe you so much. I do think that our army will now be taking on a larger portion of the effort. My cousin and his regiment are shipping out soon to join Wellesley in Portugal.”
“I agree, if we are to defeat Napoleon, it will have to be on land and that is the job of the army. I wish your cousin well and hope he returns safely.”
"As do we all, Sir. As do we all."
Darcy turned to Mrs. Gardiner and asked, “Mrs. Gardiner, did you ever have occasion to meet my parents while you were in Lambton?”
“Yes sir. I remember meeting and speaking with your mother several times over the years. She was always a pleasure to meet and obviously concerned about the welfare of people in Lambton. I remember her visiting the one or two poor families in the town and providing them with food and clothing for the children. A truly kind lady.”
“I am most gratified to hear that, madam. I could wish that my younger sister could be here while you speak of her. She has few memories of our mother and is always eager to talk with anyone who knew her.”
“I should be pleased to share the few memories that I have, should the occasion arise, Mr. Darcy.”
Wishing to talk of less personal topics, they began discussing, by mutual. unstated agreement, the various events that Jane and Elizabeth had enjoyed while in London. Darcy did discover, to his satisfaction, that both sisters were expected to remain in town for several months.
Elizabeth was maintaining her composure with some difficulty. She had recovered from the shock of turning to come face-to-face with Mr. Darcy with no warning. She had felt almost like she would faint and then, when she was struggling to regain her mental balance, she had received a second shock. He had said meeting her again was a pleasant surprise. She had recognized that he had been as shocked as herself initially, but he seemed to regain his poise much quicker. His manner had changed. She could tell that he was obviously still quite reserved but he was civil, extraordinarily so to her, and that civility had extended to everyone. He was talking with everyone around him and, if his reserve was intact, he was obviously making an effort to be amiable. And he had smiled at her and his self-deprecating comment to her uncle showed a certain willingness to admit errors on his part. And he smiled at her again at the table!! Did he still feel some affection for her? But, did it matter? Lydia had effectively ruined whatever hopes she could entertain with regard to Mr. Darcy. Elizabeth knew she was not behaving as was her usual wont in company. Her thoughts were too engaged and chaotic for that. She looked up at Mr. Darcy once again and noticed her aunt watching her with what looked to be a very speculative eye. Elizabeth suspected that her aunt would very likely want to talk seriously about Mr. Darcy. How much should she confide?
Before Elizabeth realized it, the ladies were rising from the table to go to the drawing room, leaving the gentlemen to their port and cigars. Elizabeth was approached by the hostess and asked to perform. This was not unexpected, although tonight it might be a little more difficult to remain composed. She could hope he did not sit where she could observe him while performing and discompose her. Given her feelings now, her composure would suffer much more than it had at Rosings Park when he last attended her performance. She was surprised at such thoughts. She had thought little of Mr. Darcy in recent months. She knew now she was not insensible to his attractions, nor to the fact that he had admired her greatly. Of her feelings, she was uncertain but admiration for Mr. Darcy seemed probable.
Darcy had risen to stretch his legs and was handed an excellent port. He saw Mr. Gardiner watching him from across the room, his face carefully bland. This seemed like an excellent opportunity to begin to ‘illustrate a character’ as Elizabeth had once attempted to do with him. In this case, he wanted to sketch that of Mr. Gardiner. He casually walked over and introduced himself once again, “Mr. Gardiner, I believe we were introduced but had little opportunity to converse.”
“True, Mr. Darcy. Unfortunately, we were also too separated at the table to make conversation possible.”
“I did have the opportunity to talk with your wife, sir. She obviously finds Derbyshire as beautiful as I do. It was an interesting conversation. Do you often visit the area?”
“We had planned to do so last summer but we had to cancel our plans at the last minute. Perhaps in a few years. We have no plans to travel this year or next.”
"Mr. Gardiner, our good host was most interested in having us meet. I suspect he believes that we might have some mutual interests in business. Might I call on you to discuss such possibilities?”
“Certainly, Mr. Darcy. My place of business is on _____ Street, just off Gracechurch Street.”
After arranging for a convenient time to meet, they talked amiably until their attention was captured by others. After about a half hour, their host suggested they rejoin the ladies. Darcy, upon entering the drawing room, immediately looked for Elizabeth and, seeing her by the pianoforte looking through the sheet music, approached and offered to turn the pages if she were to play. He could see her blush, hesitate and then nod her acceptance. He then leaned towards her and whispered, “I cannot read music. You will have to nod your head, or kick me, to let me know when to turn a page.”
“Is the choice mine, sir?” she whispered back. “Is he teasing me?”
“Indeed it is.”
“I will be kind then and nod, sir.”
Whereupon she sat, did a few exercises to loosen her fingers and began to play. Darcy sat beside her and when she nodded, turned a page. Watching her face was a pleasure but it took considerable self-control to not become absorbed in watching her expressions. He was not always successful and Elizabeth, on several occasions, had to repeat sections until he had gathered his wits. For her part, Elizabeth knew she was not playing as well as she usually did. She was extremely conscious of the man sitting beside her. His cologne, and a very male presence, caused her thoughts to scatter. Eventually, it was over and she received the appreciation of the other guests. She did hear Darcy say, “As always, your playing affords me considerable pleasure, Miss Elizabeth.”
A quiet, “Thank you, Mr. Darcy” was all she could manage. “He had said that before. I thought he was being sarcastic. Another misjudgement on my part?” She walked over to the hostess to get a cup of tea. Darcy did likewise and seeking an opportunity to talk with her privately, gestured towards a settee somewhat removed from everyone. “May we speak for a moment, Miss Elizabeth?” he asked.
She moved to the settee, and sat. She could see her aunt and Jane watching them both. “It will be an interesting night when I get home,” she thought.
Darcy sat down beside her and turning to face her, murmured, “I apologize. I suspect I am causing some concern on the part of your aunt and uncle.”
“I will have some explaining to do later tonight, I believe.”
“Miss Elizabeth, I cannot tell how very happy I am to meet you again. I would like an opportunity to talk with you in some privacy or as much as propriety will allow. This is not the time or place for such. May I call on you tomorrow morning?”
Elizabeth’s confusion had not abated a great deal. Of what would he want to talk? Was there any purpose given the Lydia situation, but she could hardly refuse on that basis since he could not be aware of it.
Darcy viewed her obvious indecision with increasing concern and blurted, “I am sorry. My request is obviously distressing you. You need not …” And he began to rise from the settee.
Elizabeth spoke immediately, “No! Wait, please. I would be happy to receive you tomorrow morning. I…I was simply surprised by your request. I am sure I do not deserve such consideration.”
Darcy shook his head, “Quite the contrary, Miss Elizabeth. You merit every consideration. Now, may I enquire as to your address?”
Elizabeth gave him the Gardiners’ Gracechurch Street address, looking at Darcy to see if the location bothered him but could observe no aversion on his part. Noticing her aunt approaching, Darcy stood up and offered her his seat which she accepted. Darcy offered to refill their tea, an offer graciously declined by both ladies, after which he left, ostensibly to refill his own cup, and moved to talk with others. The rest of the evening passed uneventfully for all. Upon returning home, Darcy retired to his room with a glass of brandy and a conviction that Elizabeth’s opinion of him had changed materially. Tomorrow would be difficult but he had to convince her to allow him to show that he had taken her reproofs to heart. He could hope once more.
Elizabeth’s evening, however, was not over when she arrived home. She had informed them all, during the drive home, that Mr. Darcy had asked to call tomorrow morning. Her aunt and uncle were surprised, but not unduly so, given what they observed of the behaviour of Mr. Darcy. Madeline Gardiner decided she needed a private talk with her niece before either of them slept.
As she was heading up to her room, Elizabeth was detained by her aunt. “Lizzy, we must talk. I will be up in a half hour.” There was no suggestion that the talk could or would be deferred. Elizabeth nodded and went upstairs to don her nightgown and robe. Jane wanted to talk over the evening also but Elizabeth indicated that her aunt was going to want an explanation of tonight’s events and did not seem willing to wait. Then Elizabeth sat and waited, attempting to organize her thoughts.
When her aunt entered the room, she carried a tray with biscuits and tea. Pouring a cup for them both, she passed one to Elizabeth, offered her a biscuit and sat with her back resting against the footboard of the bed. Elizabeth quirked an eyebrow, “Is this going to be that tiring, Aunt?”
“That depends on you, Lizzy. I cannot force your confidence, but I do think that there is some important information about Mr. Darcy and yourself that your uncle and I need to know.” She paused and then continued, “I know that you are used to keeping your own counsel, but this time I think you need to trust us to help you.”
“It was plain to your uncle and me, and I dare say Jane as well, that Mr. Darcy admires you a great deal. This seems to contradict the opinions you expressed a year ago when you stated he disliked you. And then, there is your behaviour. Where once you were quite adamant in your dislike, I saw evidence tonight of quite different feelings. There is much that you have not told us, Lizzy.”
Elizabeth stared at her hands, sighed and then moved to sit, resting against the headboard. “As usual, Aunt, you have grasped the essentials. I think I will have to tell the story from its beginnings, despite how badly I have behaved. Jane, by the way, knows everything.” She then talked for almost an hour, uninterrupted by anything more than the occasional “Lizzy, you did not!” or “Oh dear!” Or “He said what?” from her aunt. Elizabeth ended by retrieving the letter that Darcy had written and handed it to her aunt who read it thoroughly, twice.
Madeline Gardiner quietly considered her niece, “So many mistakes, errors of judgement, mistaken pride. I don’t suppose any couple could have done worse, if they deliberately tried to do so. If it were not for Lydia, I would think, from what I observed tonight, that a strong attachment could exist between you. Because of Lydia, I cannot see how such an attachment is possible. Mr. Darcy would face considerable censure and disapprobation, if he attached himself to you. Would he be prepared to face that consequence? I do not know. I do think you have an obligation to hear what he has to say tomorrow and I will ensure you both some privacy. Should he want to continue to see you, he will have to be told about Lydia. Do you want to do so? Or shall I? Your uncle performed the service for Jane and I would suggest either I, or your uncle, do likewise for you. “
Elizabeth considered the problem for several minutes. “It is quite likely that I will be too discomposed by our conversation to be truly coherent. Nonetheless, I think it best that I speak of Lydia.”
“Very well, I will enlighten your uncle tonight about the particulars of your relationship with Mr. Darcy. And Lizzy, do not worry and fret. It will serve no purpose. “
“Thank you, Aunt.” replied Elizabeth knowing that, no matter her wishes, her mind would not be easy. Before tonight, she had, for the most part, reconciled herself to the loss of a Mr. Darcy that she previously had not wanted. Now, with the possibility of his interest in her, she would lose him once more and the anguish would be greater since she now understood how estimable his character was.
Chapter 18
Friday, January 29, 1813 – Gracechurch Street, London
At precisely ten in the morning, Darcy presented his card requesting to see Miss Elizabeth Bennet. He was shown into the drawing room where Elizabeth and Mrs. Gardiner awaited him. He bowed to each and was acknowledged by a curtsy. Mrs. Gardiner spoke first, “Mr. Darcy, Lizzy has informed her uncle and me that you have requested a private interview. I am sure you appreciate the unusual nature of such a request, inasmuch as we are not aware of any attachment between you both. However, because of rather unique circumstances that seem to exist, and Lizzy has told us much of the history between you, we are prepared to allow you to meet in our parlour directly across the hall. The door will remain open, as will the door of this room, and I will remain here. Is that satisfactory, sir?”
“Indeed, Mrs. Gardiner. Quite satisfactory and thank you.”
Mrs. Gardiner then led the way into the parlour and seated them both. Satisfied that a proper distance separated her niece and Mr. Darcy, she returned to the drawing room.
In the parlour, each considered the other, wondering who was to start. Elizabeth believed that since Mr. Darcy had requested the interview, the responsibility for initiating the discussion rested upon him. Nevertheless, she did desperately want to apologize for her mistakes, her anger and her abuse of him. Darcy, for his part, wished to apologize but feared his tongue would betray him once again.
“Miss Bennet, I …”
“Mr Darcy, please allow …”
They looked at each other and Darcy’s small smile elicited a shake of the head from Elizabeth. A slight gesture of her hand, motioned him to proceed.
“Thank you Miss Elizabeth. I asked for this interview for a number of reasons, the first of which is to ask for your forgiveness for my behaviour to you throughout almost all of our acquaintance.”
Elizabeth could not allow this to stand unopposed. “Sir, I behaved most poorly towards you and particularly during my stay in Kent. I cannot …”
“Miss Elizabeth! Please do not upset yourself so.” responded Darcy whose feelings would not allow him to remain seated. He was up and moving towards the window before he realized he was no longer sitting. He immediately stopped himself and turned to face Elizabeth. “I apologize for such abrupt behaviour. I could not sit!”
“Miss Elizabeth, my conduct towards you, your family and even your neighbours merits the strongest reproofs. You accused me of pride, arrogance and a selfish disdain for others. I was angry, very angry at your words. It took weeks for my anger to cool enough to realize the truth of your reproof. It took some time more, before I could even recognize how grievously I had insulted you, both in the manner of my proposal and its content. I stand here ashamed of the man who made that offer of marriage to you that evening. All that I realised then was that I was not worthy of your hand in marriage.”
Elizabeth could not move her eyes from his face. That he could make such an admission seemed to her to be incredible. That it was honest, she believed she could read from his expression. She must interrupt.
“Mr. Darcy, please. I owe you an apology as well. My behaviour that night deserves much censure also. I abused you in the most abominable manner. I, who prided myself on my ability to discern people’s character, allowed my judgement to be prejudiced by an errant comment of yours on very first acquaintance. I was angered by that comment and allowed it, unconsciously, to prejudice me against your character in all of our subsequent dealings. I never would have believed Mr. Wickham’s lies, nor would I have been so insensible as to your regard, if I had not been so determined to dislike you. It took me considerable time also to understand my folly and misjudgement of your character. “
“Miss Elizabeth, I owe you a most particular apology. I can now see that at our very first acquaintance, you overheard something I said to Mr. Bingley. It was not only offensive and incorrect; it was wrong of me to utter such words in public. A most ungentlemanly thing to do. My reason, that Mr. Bingley was plaguing me badly on the occasion, does not excuse my behaviour.”
“It was wrong indeed, sir, and I fear it coloured my attitude towards you for months. For that I fear you paid a heavy price.”
“Did my letter help you to better understand my character?”
“Truly it did......and I appreciate the concern and consideration which led you to write it. It was a most gentlemanly thing to have done.”
"I was very angry when I wrote it. I can only hope that it did not disturb you too much. I know I wrote such as to cause pain, though that was not my intent.”
"It was an angry letter, to be sure, at the beginning. Its conclusion was most charitable and, if parts did pain me, I eventually could recognize the truth and honesty they contained.”
“Miss Elizabeth, I beg you not to be too harsh with yourself about Mr. Wickham. He is a practiced deceiver and you had not the experience or knowledge to recognize his character. My cousin, the Colonel, was most upset to learn that Wickham was in your area and was quite harsh with me about my failure to protect you and your neighbours from him. He believed I had an obligation to make known his misdeeds. I cannot fault his concerns. I should have done something.”
Elizabeth paled at this reference to Wickham and was tempted to confess his wickedness towards Lydia. She repressed it since she saw no useful purpose. She simply answered, “Mr. Darcy, shall we concede that both our behaviours were not above reproach. I know I have learned much from the experience and, I believe, you have done likewise.”
“Miss Elizabeth, I will not argue with you as to who bears the greatest fault. I feel that you have much less cause to reproach yourself than I.”
“Come, come, sir. Let us put this behind us. If we continue in this manner, we will be unable to discuss those other matters you mentioned.”
“Very well. Miss Elizabeth,” replied Darcy. He thought for a moment, “it seemed to me last night that Captain Stovall was quite attentive to your sister.”
“Yes, in fact he is courting her.”
“She seems happier than I can remember ever seeing her.”
“I think she is. She has told me that her heart has fully mended. “
“I am very glad to hear that.” Darcy debated whether to reveal his discussion with Bingley but decided that if he was to be truthful, he must do so. “Miss Elizabeth, last summer after my anger had abated, and I could consider your words more carefully, I realized that the opinion of a sister with intimate knowledge of Miss Bennet’s affection was almost assuredly more accurate than mine could hope to be. I decided to confront Bingley with this knowledge and that of my interference. I did so when Bingley was visiting Pemberley last August. His response, I admit quite surprised me. You see….”
As Darcy described his meeting with Bingley and the latter’s subsequent actions, he was watching Elizabeth’s face, trying to understand her feelings and thoughts about his confession but he could not decipher them. If anything, she looked surprised. When he had finished, she appeared lost in thought and then, shaking her head, she looked at him with a rueful smile. “Jane and I had quite come to the opinion that Mr. Bingley was sadly lacking in this whole affair. In fact, Jane became quite angry with him – and, Mr. Darcy she read your letter after finding it by accident and knows of your involvement. She does not hold you to blame. I do believe that her anger mended her heart quite thoroughly. She is, indeed, much happier now and I would think Captain Stovall could make her very happy indeed.”
“I am very glad to hear it.”
“Therefore Mr. Darcy, I am quite prepared to overlook, indeed forgive, your officious interference in the matter of my sister and Mr. Bingley.” This was said with a smile that Darcy could not possibly misinterpret and robbed the words of any attempt to cause pain.
“Thank you Miss Elizabeth. I believe that I should apologize to your sister as well.”
“Perhaps, although I do not see that much would be accomplished by doing so.”
“My honour, I think, requires it. But, that is for later. Miss Elizabeth, there is one more matter I wish to discuss and it is really the reason I am here today. If I had not met you last night, I fully intended to travel to Hertfordshire to call on you. I told you the simple truth last night. I had but to see you again and I found myself as much, if not more, in love with you than ever. My feelings are unchanged. I think your opinion of me has changed and I hope that you think better of me now than when I first proposed. I also came to understand that neither of us really knows the other. That was largely my fault stemming from a desire to hide my interest while in Hertfordshire. I would like to get to understand you better and to have you better understand me. Will you allow me to continue to call on you?”
Elizabeth trembled. The tension that had permeated their meeting seemed to peak. “Breathe!” She thought and took a deep breath. She looked Darcy and saw his face pale as she did not respond immediately. “He is expecting me to refuse!” She thought and immediately raised her hand to forestall his words. “Mr. Darcy, there is something you need to know before I can give you an answer.” She looked at Darcy and then, unable to face him directly, focused her gaze on the window behind him. She took a deep breath to calm her nerves and her voice, and continued, “Simply put, Mr. Darcy. My youngest sister, Lydia, eloped last summer with George Wickham. My father and uncle traced them as far as London but have not recovered her, nor have we heard from her since. My family has been shunned by its neighbours, to the extent that Jane and I have taken residence with my aunt and uncle since Christmas. It is, in every way, too horrible and painful to contemplate.”
Darcy was stunned by the magnitude of the disaster facing him and Elizabeth. He could see the pain in her eyes as she rose and, with an obvious effort at self control, spoke, “Mr. Darcy I will quite understand should you wish to reconsider any interest you might harbour. Your family should not, could not be expected to bear the taint…”
“Please, Elizabeth, do not say such.” He interrupted. It is doubtful whether either of them was sensible of his breach of propriety. He tried to gather his thoughts. Wickham again! He needed to think. Elizabeth could only see his countenance. It seemed frozen and hard; a frown suggested his disapproval, disdain. Finally, words seemed to be wrenched from him. “Miss Elizabeth, please sit. I need to collect my thoughts which are all confusion at the moment. I know not what words to offer you for comfort and would not wish to burden you with my hopes for a better resolution that would seem to require your thanks. I must depart now but would like to call on you Monday next. I am to Portsmouth today to see off my cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, whom you met at Rosings Park. He and his regiment are to sail tomorrow to join Wellesley in Portugal."
Elizabeth remembered the amiable Colonel and, gathering her composure, much shaken by his indication of a further call, answered, "I would be pleased to see you again Mr. Darcy. Please extend my wishes to Colonel Fitzwilliam for a safe voyage and that he return to his family alive and well."
Darcy assured her he would pass her message to the Colonel, after which he took his leave. Once he was out of the door, Elizabeth collapsed on her chair. Mrs. Gardiner entered the room and perceiving Elizabeth's distress, instructed a maid to bring tea and some biscuits. While awaiting the refreshments, she directed the conversation to a discussion of her children’s antics so as to dissipate the tension. Finally, tea was delivered, the door closed and privacy ensured. She then turned to Elizabeth and asked, “I am here now, Lizzy. What is the matter?”
“Aunt, Mr. Darcy has asked me to be allowed to call on Monday.”
“Do I assume that you both have resolved the many issues between you?”
Elizabeth was thoughtful before replying, ”I do not know if we have resolved all the issues, but I think we have made a start. Before I told him about Lydia, he expressed a desire for us to come to know each other much better,” Elizabeth looked at her aunt in some confusion. “Then I told him about Lydia and expected him to express his regrets and depart as soon as possible. Instead, he asked to call on Monday. I do not understand him at all. His features seemed hard, disdainful when I related the news but he asked to call. But he did not reject me. I do not understand.”
Her aunt looked at her and replied, “I think there is much more to that young man than you give him credit for, Lizzy. Could it be that he was thinking about Wickham's role? You must appreciate his feelings toward him. Now I must apprise your uncle of these circumstances. I am sure he will want to be here when Mr. Darcy calls on Monday. It was all I could do to get him to go to his office this morning. He was quite interested in your young man.”
“He is not my young man, Aunt!”
“I beg to differ, Lizzy. If he was not, he would have made polite excuses and you would never see him again.” With this, Mrs. Gardiner left to arrange lunch and send a note to her husband.
~~
Darcy returned to his house and began the process of discovering Lydia. He had determined on doing so during his ride home. Lord ______ was chairman of the organization which collected and disbursed funds to homes that assisted young women left destitute, unwed mothers and other distressed, unprotected young women. Darcy and his father had contributed to the organization for years. He should be able to get a list of the homes to which funds had been supplied. He had no idea how many such places existed, but, with the address and the name of the director of each, he would canvas them all, though it could take some time. A note to Lord _____ was quickly drafted and given to a footman to deliver.
That task completed, he considered calling on Mrs. Younge, but it was now too late for that. He would call on her tomorrow. For now, he would have to consider how he could be in Elizabeth’s company other than calling on the Gardiners.
His mind then turned to how he would conduct the search. Secrecy was necessary. No one could know for whom he was searching nor, if he found her, could Lydia’s presence be known. He would have to secrete her here at Darcy House. As his thoughts continued along these lines, they gradually became focused on Elizabeth. His desire, his need for her, was unabated. Lydia must be recovered, else it might be a year or more before he could pursue her and would she be willing to wait after he had treated her so abominably?
Thanks to Alida for her great Beta work.
Saturday January 23, 1813 – Pemberley
Richard Fitzwilliam alighted from his carriage to greet Georgiana and Darcy who had come out, despite the cold, to greet him. They hurried him inside and, after the usual greetings, he retired to his room to refresh himself and change his clothes. An hour later he joined them in the music room where Georgiana was practicing.
“I am glad you decided to break your journey at Pemberley, Richard. Where are you bound?” Darcy asked.
“London. I have some business with headquarters there. I thought I would take the opportunity to visit with you and Georgiana for a day or two. I have to depart on Monday.”
Darcy looked at his cousin carefully and wondered how much he was not saying. He knew that Fitzwilliam expected to be called back to duty. He would not press the matter now but later, yes. He raised an eyebrow at his cousin and replied, “We are pleased that you decided to do so.”
“We have someone else that we expect to break his journey with us today.” Georgiana mentioned. “Mr. Bingley is returning to York from London and we expect him later today.”
Fitzwilliam glanced at Darcy, “How is he coming along? I remember you telling me that he had grown up quite a bit in the past year.”
“He stopped here on his way to town about a fortnight ago. It is astonishing, the change in him. He has gone from boy to man almost overnight. He has become much more engaged in business activities with a consequent reduction in idleness and frivolity. I admit I am pleased to see it. I like the new Bingley very much.” Darcy replied.
Georgiana tentatively offered, “I had not seen Mr. Bingley for quite a while. The change is marked and I very much like what he has become.”
Fitzwilliam and Darcy exchanged glances and Fitzwilliam’s raised eyebrow was noted by Darcy who gave a slight nod to his cousin. “Obviously another topic for discussion with Darcy” thought Fitzwilliam.
The three cousins spent a relaxed hour before dinner discussing estate issues, tenant problems, spring planting plans and planned renovations to Pemberley. None of the topics were of pressing urgency and both Darcy and his cousin were content to let the conversation embrace such non-contentious issues. The avoidance of mention of military matters was by a mutual, unstated agreement between both men.
Bingley’s carriage rolled up to the front entrance of Pemberley just as they all sat down for dinner. Quickly rising from the table, Darcy and Georgiana hurried to greet Bingley as he was ushered into the front hall.
“Welcome Charles, I hope your journey was not too cold.”
“Thank you Darcy, I am afraid it was bitterly cold for the last hour or so. Greetings Miss Darcy, it is a pleasure to see you again so soon,”
After Bingley divested himself of outerwear, Darcy began to lead him toward the dining room, and said, “we are just starting dinner. Would you like to refresh yourself before eating? We can easily wait another quarter hour.”
Bingley immediately accepted and headed to his usual room. Before he had climbed too many stairs, Darcy mentioned that they had another guest his cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam which delighted Bingley since he and the Colonel had always enjoyed each other’s company.
A scant quarter hour later, a refreshed but tired Bingley joined the Darcys and Fitzwilliam for dinner. It was a simple meal, held in the small family dining room. The talk was deliberately light-hearted, with Fitzwilliam delighting Georgiana with tales of the antics of his nieces and nephews while visiting at his parents’ home. He also passed on an announcement, “You will most likely get a letter from my sister, announcing that she is with child again. I think her confinement is in June.”
“Marvellous news, Richard. Marvellous news! I suppose your mother is making more noises about getting you married so that you can provide more grandchildren,” teased Darcy.
Fitzwilliam laughed, “I believe she mentioned the subject once or twice.”
Once the meal was finished they decided to settle in the music room as Georgiana offered to play some pieces that she was developing. The men sat quietly sipping port and relaxing to the music flowing from Georgiana’s fingers. After about an hour she stopped and excused herself, indicating a desire to retire to her rooms to read before sleep.
Darcy invited the others to the library where a fire was warming the room. He poured himself a brandy, sat in one of the chairs ringing the fireplace, and invited the other two men to help themselves. Fitzwilliam also took a brandy, but Darcy noted with interest that Bingley poured himself a whiskey.
“Whiskey, Bingley? That is new.”
“I have acquired a taste for it over the last few months. I am getting some excellent whiskey from Scotland now.”
"Dare I ask how your efforts in London went?” Noting Fitzwilliam’s questioning look, Darcy explained a bit further: ”Bingley has decided to move to York and sold his London house. He had to help relocate the Hursts and Caroline.”
“Actually, the Hursts acquired their own house with little help from me. I did pay part of the cost since Caroline will be living with them. I cannot say how long that arrangement will last. Caroline is still not reconciled to my departure. They live in a respectable neighbourhood. Not of the first tier as Caroline would wish for, but respectable. The Hursts appear content, at least.”
“Charles, I had thought I might visit you later this year. I have no fixed plans as yet but I would like to meet this remarkable uncle of yours. He seems to have done more for you in a couple of months than I did in years.” Darcy said.
Bingley thought for a minute or two and replied, “I would be delighted to have you visit. May or June would be the opportune times although, truthfully, it does not matter a great deal.” He thought a bit more and suggested, “There are a number of people that you might be interested in meeting. The investment opportunities in the north have much potential.”
“That sounds quite intriguing; I will consider my plans. Right now I have to deal with the spring planting in April and visit my aunt in Kent.”
Looking at Fitzwilliam, Darcy hesitated and then asked, “Richard, will you be accompanying me this year?”
Fitzwilliam grimaced and shook his head. “As I suspected, you have already guessed that I will be returning to active duty. I received word several days ago and told my family. I hardly need say that they want me to resign my commission and marry. The problem is simply that I have not found the woman, with the necessary dowry, that I would want to live with for the next forty years.”
He took another sip of his brandy and sighed, “I have seen too many unhappy or unsatisfied marriages to want to take that risk or burden.”
“When do you report?”
“Wellesley is in winter quarters in Portugal as we speak. My regiment will be sailing at the end of the month to join him. It will take me every minute there is between now and then to get the regiment ready.”
“Georgiana and I had planned to travel to London on Wednesday next. I am sure we could accompany you on Monday instead.”
Fitzwilliam thought and nodded his head. “That sounds like an excellent idea. I will return my father’s carriage and travel with you.”
“Richard, do you want to break the news to Georgiana or shall I? It is possible that she has guessed already.”
“”Let me do it. It won’t be any better coming from you than me but she deserves to hear it from me.”
“Fine, I suggest you tell her after church services tomorrow. I will let her know before breakfast of the change in travel plans.”
Bingley had sat quietly throughout this discussion, finally rising to his feet and stretching. “I am tired enough from the travel and the whiskey will help me sleep. I will refresh my glass and head up to my room now before I fall asleep in this chair.”
Darcy and Fitzwilliam bade him good-night and settled down in comfortable silence with their brandy. Darcy broke the silence, “Do you remember that comment Georgie made about Bingley during your arrival? Well it appears that they had an interesting conversation about a fortnight ago when Bingley stopped here on his way to London. The crux of the matter is that Bingley asked her to save him a dance set at her ‘coming out’ ball. Mrs. Annesley, who was present for the entire conversation, saw nothing improper between them but she also suspects that each became aware of the other as a possible suitor. She believes, and it is agreed, that there is nothing to alarm us since they will be in each other's company only rarely and that dance is over a year in the future. However, it seems I must consider Bingley’s suitability as a suitor.”
Fitzwilliam had sat up straight when Darcy mentioned ‘suitor’ but then a thoughtful expression crossed his face as he responded, “You know, he might be a very good suitor if he has grown as much as you believe. I don’t give much credence to concerns about ‘trade’ if the man is a gentleman. I like Bingley quite a bit.”
“I agree. I won’t discourage his suit should he decide to press it but Georgie will have at least one season before she chooses to marry. That should let her consider the men available.”
Fitzwilliam considered Darcy overtly and decided to probe an issue that they had not talked about for months. “Tell me Cousin, what are your plans or intentions with regard to Miss Elizabeth Bennet?”
Darcy looked over at Fitzwilliam with a surprised look on his face. “Are you taking up mind-reading, Richard?”
He smiled and continued, “This has been much on my mind recently. I have determined to visit Hertfordshire and call on her. I have several engagements and business in town that I must take care of first, but I am determined to call. I cannot go on in this state of uncertainty. I must know, once and for all, if there is a chance I can win her.”
“I am glad to hear that, Cousin. I think she is too sensible a woman to still bear you a grudge, but I do think you must be completely honest with her. And for heaven’s sake, think before you speak. If your first thoughts are for her well-being, I do not see how she can refuse you.”
“Let’s to bed, Cousin, I have a lot to do tomorrow, if we are to leave two days early.”
Chapter 16
Sunday, January 24, 1813 - Pemberley
Darcy was up early as was his habit and immediately sent a note to Georgiana’s maid advising her of the change in plans and the need to begin packing for the trip to London. His own manservant, Hawkins, had been advised the previous night of the change in plans, Darcy had a number of letters to write and meetings with his steward before he could depart and he did not expect to have much free time today. Meetings that had been scheduled for Monday and Tuesday would now have to be completed this afternoon. He also had to ensure that the carriage was checked and travel arrangements changed at the two stops along the route.
Realizing that his work had reduced the time available to get ready for church services, a small breakfast was brought to his room for him to eat while getting ready. As a result, he was waiting in the front hall for the others to arrive. Once they reached the chapel, Darcy and Fitzwilliam unobtrusively ensured that Georgiana and Bingley did not sit together.
After lunch, Georgiana went to the music room to work on several pieces that she was practicing. Colonel Fitzwilliam had gone to the library after lunch but, upon hearing the sound of the piano, went in search of Georgiana. Finding her, he was quite contented to sit unobserved while she practiced. Finally, after a particularly good effort on one of the more difficult pieces, he applauded her heartily which quite caught Georgiana by surprise.
Fitzwilliam knew it would not get any easier if he waited to impart the news that he was going to Portugal but wanted to do so as gently as possible. Rising to his feet, he said, “Georgie, do you realize that I have not visited the conservatory for several years? I would like to see it again. Will you accompany me?”
Georgiana was agreeable and arm-in-arm they strolled to and into the conservatory. Fitzwilliam maintained a steady flow of light conversation as they walked. When they arrived at a spot with benches for sitting, he sat down and invited Georgiana to sit beside him. He took her hand and spoke in a very matter-of-fact voice, “Georgie, I am sure you have a suspicion of my news but I wanted to tell you myself. Headquarters has given me my orders and I am taking my regiment to join Wellesley in Portugal. I leave at the end of the month. I know that you, along with the rest of my family, do not wish for me to go but I am bound by honour and duty to serve my country. I can make no promises about my safety but I value my life and the lives of the men I lead. I risk neither their lives nor mine unnecessarily.”
Fitzwilliam could see her distress, “What troubles you so, Georgie? You know I have seen active duty before and always returned, I will do so again. I plan to dance at your wedding and I insist right now you save the third set for me. I will allow your new husband the right to the first set and won’t deprive your brother of the second, but the third is mine. Understood?”
Giving her a quick hug, he teased some more, “Now, if I am to be a proper guardian, I need to know your wishes in terms of a husband. Who and what should we look for in your husband? Short? Fat? Scottish with a brogue you could cut with a knife? Old? You really must help your brother and me to sort through all the candidates and let us know your preferences.”
“Richard, I don’t want to even think about marriage right now.” Georgiana replied trying to stifle a giggle, “And certainly not about a short, fat, old Scotsman.” And she gave a delicate shudder.
“Nonsense, my girl. All young ladies think about potential husbands. Come, come …confess it now, what does he look like? Tall, perhaps? Dark hair? A bit of a fop? An Earl, at the very least?”
Georgiana giggled, “No, No ….. Well, perhaps tall, anyway.”
“You need to help me a little more, Georgie. You have only eliminated two out of three men in England. That still leaves me with a very, very large crowd. If he must have a title, that can reduce the numbers quite a bit. There cannot be that many men with a title, can there?” The last was uttered rather plaintively by Fitzwilliam.
Georgiana hesitated slightly. She found this teasing to be slightly uncomfortable and decided to hedge her answer, “A title would be nice I suppose, but hardly necessary.” She paused and then, more seriously, responded, “I think I want a good man. With such examples as you and my brother, I could hardly settle for less, now could I?”
“Ah….you are not playing fair, Georgie. Be careful what you wish for. You could get my visage and your brother’s manners.”
“Oh, my brother’s manners are not so bad.” Georgiana replied attempting to control a smile.
Fitzwilliam laughed, “Minx!”
They both fell silent for several minutes and then Fitzwilliam looked at Georgiana, “I may not be home in time for your first ball but if I am, I want the second set. Promise?”
“I promise! It is yours!”
Fitzwilliam went over to her and gave her a hug, saying “I will write as often as I can but the post service is rather poor when people are fighting. I hope you will write to me often. I will be in London for about three weeks before I depart. I expect to be very busy but will make an effort to see you several times before I leave.”
They both started at the sound of a cough and turned to see Bingley standing on the pathway.
“I hope I am not intruding?”
“Not at all, "responded Fitzwilliam. “I was just getting Georgie to tell me what she wants in a suitor when she is of age to have such. So far we have only determined that she does not want a short, fat, old Scotsman with a heavy brogue.”
“Does anyone want such a man?” chuckled Bingley as he sat down. He had been standing on the path for several minutes watching and considering Georgiana before making his presence known. He was more and more impressed with her. He knew she was obviously still too young to consider marriage and he himself was not ready either; but he could see no reason not to cultivate her acquaintance as a friend and thus keep himself in her attention.
“Miss Darcy, I have been living in York for several months now and have yet to hear your equal on the pianoforte. Could you oblige me with a little music?”
“I would be happy to do so.” Saying which, Georgiana led the way back to the music room and began playing some lively Scottish and English ballads. After playing for an hour, she excused herself claiming a desire to rest. The two gentlemen continued to talk in a desultory manner until Bingley suggested a game of billiards, which claimed their attention until it was time to prepare for dinner.
Dinner itself was a quiet affair, as was the remainder of the evening, which most spent reading and completing their preparations to depart at first light in the morning.
Sunday January 24, 1813 – Gracechurch Street, London
Jane was trying to remember the last time she had been as content – happy perhaps – as she did at this moment. Captain Stovall had been courting her officially for a fortnight and she had been in his presence almost every day that he was not in Portsmouth. Oddly enough, while some of that time his attention was directed to the Gardiner children or to the Gardiners themselves, that had not lessened the pleasure she took in his company. She could not remember now if she ever had talked with Mr. Bingley as she talked with Amos – for she was beginning to think of him as Amos now. They had talked about his years at sea, her time in Hertfordshire and some of their hopes for the future. She was getting to know the man and she approved of him very much. His comfortable play with the children – and he had become a favourite with them – bode well for a future in which they had children. Her mind came to a lurching stop – they had children. Was she…had she already arrived at a decision, should he offer marriage? She blushed and looked quickly at his face as he walked beside her. Yes! Should he ask, she would be very happy to accept.
Captain Stovall was equally contented with one small niggling concern. He believed strongly that the woman on his arm was one he would delight to call his wife. She had a good heart, a kind heart, a loving heart and a strong, sensible approach to life. But he must know if some part of that heart still belonged to another man. He was determined to speak and this seemed as good a time as any.
“Miss Bennet! I am going to ask what most people would consider a very improper question. You see, the first evening I dined with you and your family, Mr. Gardiner and I had a short discussion over port after the meal. His sole concern was for your well-being and he intimated that your affections had been engaged by the particular attentions of a gentleman who then left without making an offer, which caused you considerable distress. Mr. Gardiner considered the gentleman’s behaviour somewhat dishonourable and wanted to prevent a reoccurrence. I was most willing to provide such assurances. My question is simply this, Miss Bennet – Is your heart unattached?”
Jane’s feet simply stopped working as she came to a complete stop and looked up at him in some amazement. By stopping, she had forced Captain Stovall to partially turn and face her. She continued to gaze at him for a few more seconds and then, reaching a decision, forced them both to resume walking.
“Captain Stovall, you promised me honesty, when you offered a courtship. I find myself unable to be anything less. The gentleman, Mr. Bingley – I see no reason to hide his name, since you will likely learn it should you meet my mother – was quite handsome and amiable. He most assuredly engaged my affections and I certainly believed myself to be falling in love with him. Then he left, promising to return but did not. I was hurt - hurt and very confused - for months. I learned that he had been convinced by friends and relatives to leave because of my poor connections, some impropriety of my mother and younger sisters, a lack of dowry and a belief that I was only interested in him because of his wealth. My hurt and pain gradually turned to anger. Anger that he knew me so poorly as to believe such of me. Now…..even the anger is gone. If I were to meet Mr. Bingley tomorrow, it would be as an acquaintance…..no more. The only person in Longbourn to now regret his departure is my mother and her lamentations do nothing more than cause me irritation.”
Jane turned her face to look directly at the Captain, raised an eyebrow and smiled, “So Captain, if I have not answered your actual question, I have, I think, been honest in answering the implied question, have I not?”
He stopped turned to face her and taking her hands in his bestowed a kiss on each, saying, “Yes, Miss Bennet, you most certainly have.” Then turning to walk once again, he settled her hand on his arm, placed his other hand over hers and intertwined their fingers. “She did not say her heart was unattached, only that it was not attached to this Bingley. Excellent!”
In this fashion, they continued to stroll through the park until recalled by Elizabeth’s reminder that dinner was approaching. Elizabeth was quite amused by Jane’s absorption in the Captain and the pleasure expressed on her countenance. She was convinced that removal from her mother’s profusions and manipulation had allowed Jane to display her feelings more openly since she no longer had cause to guard the expression of those feelings.
She thought back to the past two weeks during which they had gone to the play Twelfth Night, walked in Hyde Park and attended a dinner party; society enough to satisfy even her desire for company. A grin crossed her face when she considered the night they went to see the play. While she had chosen to wear a relatively modest evening gown, Jane had selected one that was rather more daring. It was deep blue with simple, classic lines and a v-neck which displayed the upper portion of her breasts. She looked absolutely stunning which described the look on the Captain’s face when Jane descended the stairs in the Gardiner house. He hardly took his eyes off her on the ride to the theatre and, once there, was the first to exit the carriage. Turning, he offered his hand to help Elizabeth descend and then offered his hand to Jane who, grasping his hand with her own stepped out of the carriage bending forward slightly as she did so. The Captain’s intake of air was quite noticeable and a blush spread over both his and Jane’s countenance. Only Elizabeth noticed the small smile of pleasure on Jane’s lips.
After Mr. Gardiner assisted his wife out of the carriage, the party moved slowly through the crowd. After divesting themselves of their outerwear, they moved into the intermission area. Jane quickly attracted surreptitious and admiring glances from many of the men. Captain Stovall did not appear to mind at all, satisfied to be the man escorting her to the play. Several couples known to the Gardiners approached and were introduced but Mr. Gardiner and the Captain were persistent in moving their party forward and towards their seats.
Once seated, Elizabeth had enjoyed and attended the play so closely that she had little attention left for the rest of party. While it was not one of her preferred Shakespeare's histories, it was so well acted that she was lured in almost despite herself. Captain Stovall was completely enraptured, repeating several times that seeing the words come to life on a stage gave new meaning to them. He vowed that he would make every effort to see another play before his time onshore ended.
Returning home, they had partaken of a light tea after which Captain Stovall made ready to leave. Elizabeth and Jane accompanied him to the front door and, Elizabeth having deliberately stepped several paces back to give them some privacy, he turned and took Jane’s hand, saying, “I thought tomorrow I might visit a bookstore. Would you and Elizabeth wish to accompany me?” Upon receiving her agreement, he raised her hand and turned it, pressing a kiss to the palm of her hand causing a small gasp by Jane. A pleased smile graced his face as he murmured, “I will call at ten then, Miss Bennet.”
Elizabeth had teased her sister quite thoroughly afterwards and was now only wondering when the good Captain would offer for Jane. Her sister’s affections were no longer in doubt. The pleasure she received from his attentions left little doubt Captain Stovall’s suit would be successful. The only issue lay in when he would make his offer.
Chapter 17
Thursday, January 28, 1813 – London
Darcy stepped down from his carriage in front of the Johnson home. It was a fairly modern, four story building somewhat smaller than his own house and located in one of the better sections of the city. His arrival must have been anticipated because the butler had the door open before he reached it. Recognizing Darcy immediately, he bowed and then motioned a footman to take Darcy’s hat and cloak saying, “Mr. and Mrs. Johnson are with the other guests in the drawing room, Mr. Darcy.” He led Darcy there and opened the doors, waiting for Darcy to pass through. Darcy paused in the doorway to assess the people within the room. With a quick scan, he recognized two couples, apart from the Johnsons, that were known to him.
He saw his presence was recognized as Mr. Johnson moved quickly towards him. “Mr. Darcy, welcome.” he said in a quiet voice. “As ever, we are pleased you could join us tonight.”
“How could I pass up the opportunity for fine food and fine conversation? I welcomed your invitation.”
“There are several people that I would particularly like to introduce to your acquaintance tonight, Mr. Darcy.”
“By all means, Mr. Johnson but I would like to greet my hostess first, if I may.”
“Certainly, sir. She is sitting over there.” Saying which Mr. Johnson led Darcy to Mrs. Johnson with whom he then chatted for several minutes. Seeing Mr. Johnson’s slight impatience, Darcy smiled and let himself be led away. For a quarter hour, Mr. Johnson guided him to several gentlemen and their wives, effecting introductions and their connection to Mr. Johnson.
Looking around Mr. Johnson said, “There is one more gentleman that I would most particularly like to make known to you. I have only become acquainted with him in the last six months or so. He has made it possible for me to expand my production by his access to markets in other countries. It has truly been fortuitous for me.” Saying this, he led Darcy towards a gentleman who was talking to several young ladies as well as a woman and a gentleman only a few years older than Darcy himself.
As they approached the group, the young ladies turned in response to a slight nod from the gentleman facing Darcy. His shock was total. He heard Johnson speaking but he could not understand the words. All he could see was her face. He wondered if his was as pale.
“Mr. Darcy, are you all right, sir?”
He grasped the remnants of his self control, essayed a small smile and replied, “Perfectly, sir. I was simply caught totally by surprise.” And, looking directly at Elizabeth, “A most pleasant surprise!”
Johnson was not sure what exactly had happened but obviously Mr. Darcy was known to at least one of the Gardiner party. He pressed on, “Mr. Darcy, may I make known to you Mr. Edward Gardiner, Mrs. Madeline Gardiner, Captain Stovall and Mr. Gardiner’s nieces, Miss Jane Bennet and Miss Elizabeth Bennet. Ladies, gentlemen, allow me to introduce Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy, who is from Derbyshire.”
Darcy bowed and spoke quickly, “I had the very great please of meeting the Miss Bennets in Hertfordshire while visiting a friend there. It is a pleasure to meet you both once again. Mr. Gardiner, Mrs Gardiner, I am pleased to make your acquaintance also. I seem to remember hearing Miss Elizabeth speak fondly of you both.”
Mr. Gardiner responded, since both of his nieces seemed to have lost the power of speech, “Elizabeth has spoken of you also, Mr. Darcy.”
Darcy raised an eyebrow and, glanced at Elizabeth, before looking at Mr. Gardiner and replying “That was most equivocal, Sir. But I suspect she treated me most justly.”
He could feel Elizabeth searching his face. He turned to Jane and asked, “Miss Bennet, I trust your family are all well?”
"Yes, Mr. Darcy, my family in Hertfordshire are indeed all well.”
"How long have you been in London?”
“Our aunt and uncle visited us at Longbourn over Christmas and we returned with them a few days later.”
Darcy continued to become acquainted with the other members of the party and had just discovered that Mrs. Gardiner had ties to Derbyshire when conversation was cut short by the announcement that dinner was to be served and everyone began to move towards the dining room. Darcy had hopes of acquiring a seat close to Elizabeth and was only partially successful. Her place was on the other side of the table and offset by two other people. Fortunately, he could observe her and hear parts of her conversation. The uncertainty that had begun to plague him – that both his memories and love of Elizabeth were fading – was gone. He found that his admiration and longing were as strong now as they ever were, and possibly stronger. He wanted nothing more than to simply look and admire her.
"I must attend, I must behave in a civil manner with those around me.” It took a conscious effort to begin to talk with the people on either side of him. He hoped he was not appearing too distracted but he knew his eyes were constantly shifting to look at Elizabeth. Mrs. Gardiner had taken the seat next to him which provided him with the opportunity to talk with her about Derbyshire and gaze at Elizabeth, who was sitting almost directly across from her aunt, with, he hoped, discretion. Having spent many years prior to her marriage in Lambton Mrs. Gardiner knew Derbyshire well and had also toured Pemberley and its grounds several times. Through her conversation, she had quickly impressed him as a genteel, elegant and intelligent lady and it was obvious that she had been a positive influence on the two eldest Bennet sisters. Good manners required Darcy to pay some attention to the lady on his other side and, after several attempts to discover a topic of mutual interest, he was able to engage her in talk about her charitable work which attempted to provide some education to children in impoverished areas. He could not help but be impressed with her dedication and enthusiasm as she expounded on the various projects that were underway, and was not reluctant to promise financial support to her efforts.
Turning to talk again with Mrs. Gardiner, he saw Elizabeth gazing at him. He gave a small nod of his head and a slight smile and was gratified to have it returned. His attention was then captured by Mrs. Gardiner who had begun to talk with the gentleman sitting across from him – a Captain Stovall, who Darcy now remembered as part of the Gardiner party. From Mrs. Gardiner’s comments, Darcy realized he was a naval captain and asked, “Are you between commands, Captain?”
"No, Mr.Darcy. My ship is in sad shape and laid up being repaired. I probably will not get back into the war until the summer.”
“The navy has borne a huge portion of the war burden so far and we all owe you so much. I do think that our army will now be taking on a larger portion of the effort. My cousin and his regiment are shipping out soon to join Wellesley in Portugal.”
“I agree, if we are to defeat Napoleon, it will have to be on land and that is the job of the army. I wish your cousin well and hope he returns safely.”
"As do we all, Sir. As do we all."
Darcy turned to Mrs. Gardiner and asked, “Mrs. Gardiner, did you ever have occasion to meet my parents while you were in Lambton?”
“Yes sir. I remember meeting and speaking with your mother several times over the years. She was always a pleasure to meet and obviously concerned about the welfare of people in Lambton. I remember her visiting the one or two poor families in the town and providing them with food and clothing for the children. A truly kind lady.”
“I am most gratified to hear that, madam. I could wish that my younger sister could be here while you speak of her. She has few memories of our mother and is always eager to talk with anyone who knew her.”
“I should be pleased to share the few memories that I have, should the occasion arise, Mr. Darcy.”
Wishing to talk of less personal topics, they began discussing, by mutual. unstated agreement, the various events that Jane and Elizabeth had enjoyed while in London. Darcy did discover, to his satisfaction, that both sisters were expected to remain in town for several months.
Elizabeth was maintaining her composure with some difficulty. She had recovered from the shock of turning to come face-to-face with Mr. Darcy with no warning. She had felt almost like she would faint and then, when she was struggling to regain her mental balance, she had received a second shock. He had said meeting her again was a pleasant surprise. She had recognized that he had been as shocked as herself initially, but he seemed to regain his poise much quicker. His manner had changed. She could tell that he was obviously still quite reserved but he was civil, extraordinarily so to her, and that civility had extended to everyone. He was talking with everyone around him and, if his reserve was intact, he was obviously making an effort to be amiable. And he had smiled at her and his self-deprecating comment to her uncle showed a certain willingness to admit errors on his part. And he smiled at her again at the table!! Did he still feel some affection for her? But, did it matter? Lydia had effectively ruined whatever hopes she could entertain with regard to Mr. Darcy. Elizabeth knew she was not behaving as was her usual wont in company. Her thoughts were too engaged and chaotic for that. She looked up at Mr. Darcy once again and noticed her aunt watching her with what looked to be a very speculative eye. Elizabeth suspected that her aunt would very likely want to talk seriously about Mr. Darcy. How much should she confide?
Before Elizabeth realized it, the ladies were rising from the table to go to the drawing room, leaving the gentlemen to their port and cigars. Elizabeth was approached by the hostess and asked to perform. This was not unexpected, although tonight it might be a little more difficult to remain composed. She could hope he did not sit where she could observe him while performing and discompose her. Given her feelings now, her composure would suffer much more than it had at Rosings Park when he last attended her performance. She was surprised at such thoughts. She had thought little of Mr. Darcy in recent months. She knew now she was not insensible to his attractions, nor to the fact that he had admired her greatly. Of her feelings, she was uncertain but admiration for Mr. Darcy seemed probable.
Darcy had risen to stretch his legs and was handed an excellent port. He saw Mr. Gardiner watching him from across the room, his face carefully bland. This seemed like an excellent opportunity to begin to ‘illustrate a character’ as Elizabeth had once attempted to do with him. In this case, he wanted to sketch that of Mr. Gardiner. He casually walked over and introduced himself once again, “Mr. Gardiner, I believe we were introduced but had little opportunity to converse.”
“True, Mr. Darcy. Unfortunately, we were also too separated at the table to make conversation possible.”
“I did have the opportunity to talk with your wife, sir. She obviously finds Derbyshire as beautiful as I do. It was an interesting conversation. Do you often visit the area?”
“We had planned to do so last summer but we had to cancel our plans at the last minute. Perhaps in a few years. We have no plans to travel this year or next.”
"Mr. Gardiner, our good host was most interested in having us meet. I suspect he believes that we might have some mutual interests in business. Might I call on you to discuss such possibilities?”
“Certainly, Mr. Darcy. My place of business is on _____ Street, just off Gracechurch Street.”
After arranging for a convenient time to meet, they talked amiably until their attention was captured by others. After about a half hour, their host suggested they rejoin the ladies. Darcy, upon entering the drawing room, immediately looked for Elizabeth and, seeing her by the pianoforte looking through the sheet music, approached and offered to turn the pages if she were to play. He could see her blush, hesitate and then nod her acceptance. He then leaned towards her and whispered, “I cannot read music. You will have to nod your head, or kick me, to let me know when to turn a page.”
“Is the choice mine, sir?” she whispered back. “Is he teasing me?”
“Indeed it is.”
“I will be kind then and nod, sir.”
Whereupon she sat, did a few exercises to loosen her fingers and began to play. Darcy sat beside her and when she nodded, turned a page. Watching her face was a pleasure but it took considerable self-control to not become absorbed in watching her expressions. He was not always successful and Elizabeth, on several occasions, had to repeat sections until he had gathered his wits. For her part, Elizabeth knew she was not playing as well as she usually did. She was extremely conscious of the man sitting beside her. His cologne, and a very male presence, caused her thoughts to scatter. Eventually, it was over and she received the appreciation of the other guests. She did hear Darcy say, “As always, your playing affords me considerable pleasure, Miss Elizabeth.”
A quiet, “Thank you, Mr. Darcy” was all she could manage. “He had said that before. I thought he was being sarcastic. Another misjudgement on my part?” She walked over to the hostess to get a cup of tea. Darcy did likewise and seeking an opportunity to talk with her privately, gestured towards a settee somewhat removed from everyone. “May we speak for a moment, Miss Elizabeth?” he asked.
She moved to the settee, and sat. She could see her aunt and Jane watching them both. “It will be an interesting night when I get home,” she thought.
Darcy sat down beside her and turning to face her, murmured, “I apologize. I suspect I am causing some concern on the part of your aunt and uncle.”
“I will have some explaining to do later tonight, I believe.”
“Miss Elizabeth, I cannot tell how very happy I am to meet you again. I would like an opportunity to talk with you in some privacy or as much as propriety will allow. This is not the time or place for such. May I call on you tomorrow morning?”
Elizabeth’s confusion had not abated a great deal. Of what would he want to talk? Was there any purpose given the Lydia situation, but she could hardly refuse on that basis since he could not be aware of it.
Darcy viewed her obvious indecision with increasing concern and blurted, “I am sorry. My request is obviously distressing you. You need not …” And he began to rise from the settee.
Elizabeth spoke immediately, “No! Wait, please. I would be happy to receive you tomorrow morning. I…I was simply surprised by your request. I am sure I do not deserve such consideration.”
Darcy shook his head, “Quite the contrary, Miss Elizabeth. You merit every consideration. Now, may I enquire as to your address?”
Elizabeth gave him the Gardiners’ Gracechurch Street address, looking at Darcy to see if the location bothered him but could observe no aversion on his part. Noticing her aunt approaching, Darcy stood up and offered her his seat which she accepted. Darcy offered to refill their tea, an offer graciously declined by both ladies, after which he left, ostensibly to refill his own cup, and moved to talk with others. The rest of the evening passed uneventfully for all. Upon returning home, Darcy retired to his room with a glass of brandy and a conviction that Elizabeth’s opinion of him had changed materially. Tomorrow would be difficult but he had to convince her to allow him to show that he had taken her reproofs to heart. He could hope once more.
Elizabeth’s evening, however, was not over when she arrived home. She had informed them all, during the drive home, that Mr. Darcy had asked to call tomorrow morning. Her aunt and uncle were surprised, but not unduly so, given what they observed of the behaviour of Mr. Darcy. Madeline Gardiner decided she needed a private talk with her niece before either of them slept.
As she was heading up to her room, Elizabeth was detained by her aunt. “Lizzy, we must talk. I will be up in a half hour.” There was no suggestion that the talk could or would be deferred. Elizabeth nodded and went upstairs to don her nightgown and robe. Jane wanted to talk over the evening also but Elizabeth indicated that her aunt was going to want an explanation of tonight’s events and did not seem willing to wait. Then Elizabeth sat and waited, attempting to organize her thoughts.
When her aunt entered the room, she carried a tray with biscuits and tea. Pouring a cup for them both, she passed one to Elizabeth, offered her a biscuit and sat with her back resting against the footboard of the bed. Elizabeth quirked an eyebrow, “Is this going to be that tiring, Aunt?”
“That depends on you, Lizzy. I cannot force your confidence, but I do think that there is some important information about Mr. Darcy and yourself that your uncle and I need to know.” She paused and then continued, “I know that you are used to keeping your own counsel, but this time I think you need to trust us to help you.”
“It was plain to your uncle and me, and I dare say Jane as well, that Mr. Darcy admires you a great deal. This seems to contradict the opinions you expressed a year ago when you stated he disliked you. And then, there is your behaviour. Where once you were quite adamant in your dislike, I saw evidence tonight of quite different feelings. There is much that you have not told us, Lizzy.”
Elizabeth stared at her hands, sighed and then moved to sit, resting against the headboard. “As usual, Aunt, you have grasped the essentials. I think I will have to tell the story from its beginnings, despite how badly I have behaved. Jane, by the way, knows everything.” She then talked for almost an hour, uninterrupted by anything more than the occasional “Lizzy, you did not!” or “Oh dear!” Or “He said what?” from her aunt. Elizabeth ended by retrieving the letter that Darcy had written and handed it to her aunt who read it thoroughly, twice.
Madeline Gardiner quietly considered her niece, “So many mistakes, errors of judgement, mistaken pride. I don’t suppose any couple could have done worse, if they deliberately tried to do so. If it were not for Lydia, I would think, from what I observed tonight, that a strong attachment could exist between you. Because of Lydia, I cannot see how such an attachment is possible. Mr. Darcy would face considerable censure and disapprobation, if he attached himself to you. Would he be prepared to face that consequence? I do not know. I do think you have an obligation to hear what he has to say tomorrow and I will ensure you both some privacy. Should he want to continue to see you, he will have to be told about Lydia. Do you want to do so? Or shall I? Your uncle performed the service for Jane and I would suggest either I, or your uncle, do likewise for you. “
Elizabeth considered the problem for several minutes. “It is quite likely that I will be too discomposed by our conversation to be truly coherent. Nonetheless, I think it best that I speak of Lydia.”
“Very well, I will enlighten your uncle tonight about the particulars of your relationship with Mr. Darcy. And Lizzy, do not worry and fret. It will serve no purpose. “
“Thank you, Aunt.” replied Elizabeth knowing that, no matter her wishes, her mind would not be easy. Before tonight, she had, for the most part, reconciled herself to the loss of a Mr. Darcy that she previously had not wanted. Now, with the possibility of his interest in her, she would lose him once more and the anguish would be greater since she now understood how estimable his character was.
Chapter 18
Friday, January 29, 1813 – Gracechurch Street, London
At precisely ten in the morning, Darcy presented his card requesting to see Miss Elizabeth Bennet. He was shown into the drawing room where Elizabeth and Mrs. Gardiner awaited him. He bowed to each and was acknowledged by a curtsy. Mrs. Gardiner spoke first, “Mr. Darcy, Lizzy has informed her uncle and me that you have requested a private interview. I am sure you appreciate the unusual nature of such a request, inasmuch as we are not aware of any attachment between you both. However, because of rather unique circumstances that seem to exist, and Lizzy has told us much of the history between you, we are prepared to allow you to meet in our parlour directly across the hall. The door will remain open, as will the door of this room, and I will remain here. Is that satisfactory, sir?”
“Indeed, Mrs. Gardiner. Quite satisfactory and thank you.”
Mrs. Gardiner then led the way into the parlour and seated them both. Satisfied that a proper distance separated her niece and Mr. Darcy, she returned to the drawing room.
In the parlour, each considered the other, wondering who was to start. Elizabeth believed that since Mr. Darcy had requested the interview, the responsibility for initiating the discussion rested upon him. Nevertheless, she did desperately want to apologize for her mistakes, her anger and her abuse of him. Darcy, for his part, wished to apologize but feared his tongue would betray him once again.
“Miss Bennet, I …”
“Mr Darcy, please allow …”
They looked at each other and Darcy’s small smile elicited a shake of the head from Elizabeth. A slight gesture of her hand, motioned him to proceed.
“Thank you Miss Elizabeth. I asked for this interview for a number of reasons, the first of which is to ask for your forgiveness for my behaviour to you throughout almost all of our acquaintance.”
Elizabeth could not allow this to stand unopposed. “Sir, I behaved most poorly towards you and particularly during my stay in Kent. I cannot …”
“Miss Elizabeth! Please do not upset yourself so.” responded Darcy whose feelings would not allow him to remain seated. He was up and moving towards the window before he realized he was no longer sitting. He immediately stopped himself and turned to face Elizabeth. “I apologize for such abrupt behaviour. I could not sit!”
“Miss Elizabeth, my conduct towards you, your family and even your neighbours merits the strongest reproofs. You accused me of pride, arrogance and a selfish disdain for others. I was angry, very angry at your words. It took weeks for my anger to cool enough to realize the truth of your reproof. It took some time more, before I could even recognize how grievously I had insulted you, both in the manner of my proposal and its content. I stand here ashamed of the man who made that offer of marriage to you that evening. All that I realised then was that I was not worthy of your hand in marriage.”
Elizabeth could not move her eyes from his face. That he could make such an admission seemed to her to be incredible. That it was honest, she believed she could read from his expression. She must interrupt.
“Mr. Darcy, please. I owe you an apology as well. My behaviour that night deserves much censure also. I abused you in the most abominable manner. I, who prided myself on my ability to discern people’s character, allowed my judgement to be prejudiced by an errant comment of yours on very first acquaintance. I was angered by that comment and allowed it, unconsciously, to prejudice me against your character in all of our subsequent dealings. I never would have believed Mr. Wickham’s lies, nor would I have been so insensible as to your regard, if I had not been so determined to dislike you. It took me considerable time also to understand my folly and misjudgement of your character. “
“Miss Elizabeth, I owe you a most particular apology. I can now see that at our very first acquaintance, you overheard something I said to Mr. Bingley. It was not only offensive and incorrect; it was wrong of me to utter such words in public. A most ungentlemanly thing to do. My reason, that Mr. Bingley was plaguing me badly on the occasion, does not excuse my behaviour.”
“It was wrong indeed, sir, and I fear it coloured my attitude towards you for months. For that I fear you paid a heavy price.”
“Did my letter help you to better understand my character?”
“Truly it did......and I appreciate the concern and consideration which led you to write it. It was a most gentlemanly thing to have done.”
"I was very angry when I wrote it. I can only hope that it did not disturb you too much. I know I wrote such as to cause pain, though that was not my intent.”
"It was an angry letter, to be sure, at the beginning. Its conclusion was most charitable and, if parts did pain me, I eventually could recognize the truth and honesty they contained.”
“Miss Elizabeth, I beg you not to be too harsh with yourself about Mr. Wickham. He is a practiced deceiver and you had not the experience or knowledge to recognize his character. My cousin, the Colonel, was most upset to learn that Wickham was in your area and was quite harsh with me about my failure to protect you and your neighbours from him. He believed I had an obligation to make known his misdeeds. I cannot fault his concerns. I should have done something.”
Elizabeth paled at this reference to Wickham and was tempted to confess his wickedness towards Lydia. She repressed it since she saw no useful purpose. She simply answered, “Mr. Darcy, shall we concede that both our behaviours were not above reproach. I know I have learned much from the experience and, I believe, you have done likewise.”
“Miss Elizabeth, I will not argue with you as to who bears the greatest fault. I feel that you have much less cause to reproach yourself than I.”
“Come, come, sir. Let us put this behind us. If we continue in this manner, we will be unable to discuss those other matters you mentioned.”
“Very well. Miss Elizabeth,” replied Darcy. He thought for a moment, “it seemed to me last night that Captain Stovall was quite attentive to your sister.”
“Yes, in fact he is courting her.”
“She seems happier than I can remember ever seeing her.”
“I think she is. She has told me that her heart has fully mended. “
“I am very glad to hear that.” Darcy debated whether to reveal his discussion with Bingley but decided that if he was to be truthful, he must do so. “Miss Elizabeth, last summer after my anger had abated, and I could consider your words more carefully, I realized that the opinion of a sister with intimate knowledge of Miss Bennet’s affection was almost assuredly more accurate than mine could hope to be. I decided to confront Bingley with this knowledge and that of my interference. I did so when Bingley was visiting Pemberley last August. His response, I admit quite surprised me. You see….”
As Darcy described his meeting with Bingley and the latter’s subsequent actions, he was watching Elizabeth’s face, trying to understand her feelings and thoughts about his confession but he could not decipher them. If anything, she looked surprised. When he had finished, she appeared lost in thought and then, shaking her head, she looked at him with a rueful smile. “Jane and I had quite come to the opinion that Mr. Bingley was sadly lacking in this whole affair. In fact, Jane became quite angry with him – and, Mr. Darcy she read your letter after finding it by accident and knows of your involvement. She does not hold you to blame. I do believe that her anger mended her heart quite thoroughly. She is, indeed, much happier now and I would think Captain Stovall could make her very happy indeed.”
“I am very glad to hear it.”
“Therefore Mr. Darcy, I am quite prepared to overlook, indeed forgive, your officious interference in the matter of my sister and Mr. Bingley.” This was said with a smile that Darcy could not possibly misinterpret and robbed the words of any attempt to cause pain.
“Thank you Miss Elizabeth. I believe that I should apologize to your sister as well.”
“Perhaps, although I do not see that much would be accomplished by doing so.”
“My honour, I think, requires it. But, that is for later. Miss Elizabeth, there is one more matter I wish to discuss and it is really the reason I am here today. If I had not met you last night, I fully intended to travel to Hertfordshire to call on you. I told you the simple truth last night. I had but to see you again and I found myself as much, if not more, in love with you than ever. My feelings are unchanged. I think your opinion of me has changed and I hope that you think better of me now than when I first proposed. I also came to understand that neither of us really knows the other. That was largely my fault stemming from a desire to hide my interest while in Hertfordshire. I would like to get to understand you better and to have you better understand me. Will you allow me to continue to call on you?”
Elizabeth trembled. The tension that had permeated their meeting seemed to peak. “Breathe!” She thought and took a deep breath. She looked Darcy and saw his face pale as she did not respond immediately. “He is expecting me to refuse!” She thought and immediately raised her hand to forestall his words. “Mr. Darcy, there is something you need to know before I can give you an answer.” She looked at Darcy and then, unable to face him directly, focused her gaze on the window behind him. She took a deep breath to calm her nerves and her voice, and continued, “Simply put, Mr. Darcy. My youngest sister, Lydia, eloped last summer with George Wickham. My father and uncle traced them as far as London but have not recovered her, nor have we heard from her since. My family has been shunned by its neighbours, to the extent that Jane and I have taken residence with my aunt and uncle since Christmas. It is, in every way, too horrible and painful to contemplate.”
Darcy was stunned by the magnitude of the disaster facing him and Elizabeth. He could see the pain in her eyes as she rose and, with an obvious effort at self control, spoke, “Mr. Darcy I will quite understand should you wish to reconsider any interest you might harbour. Your family should not, could not be expected to bear the taint…”
“Please, Elizabeth, do not say such.” He interrupted. It is doubtful whether either of them was sensible of his breach of propriety. He tried to gather his thoughts. Wickham again! He needed to think. Elizabeth could only see his countenance. It seemed frozen and hard; a frown suggested his disapproval, disdain. Finally, words seemed to be wrenched from him. “Miss Elizabeth, please sit. I need to collect my thoughts which are all confusion at the moment. I know not what words to offer you for comfort and would not wish to burden you with my hopes for a better resolution that would seem to require your thanks. I must depart now but would like to call on you Monday next. I am to Portsmouth today to see off my cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, whom you met at Rosings Park. He and his regiment are to sail tomorrow to join Wellesley in Portugal."
Elizabeth remembered the amiable Colonel and, gathering her composure, much shaken by his indication of a further call, answered, "I would be pleased to see you again Mr. Darcy. Please extend my wishes to Colonel Fitzwilliam for a safe voyage and that he return to his family alive and well."
Darcy assured her he would pass her message to the Colonel, after which he took his leave. Once he was out of the door, Elizabeth collapsed on her chair. Mrs. Gardiner entered the room and perceiving Elizabeth's distress, instructed a maid to bring tea and some biscuits. While awaiting the refreshments, she directed the conversation to a discussion of her children’s antics so as to dissipate the tension. Finally, tea was delivered, the door closed and privacy ensured. She then turned to Elizabeth and asked, “I am here now, Lizzy. What is the matter?”
“Aunt, Mr. Darcy has asked me to be allowed to call on Monday.”
“Do I assume that you both have resolved the many issues between you?”
Elizabeth was thoughtful before replying, ”I do not know if we have resolved all the issues, but I think we have made a start. Before I told him about Lydia, he expressed a desire for us to come to know each other much better,” Elizabeth looked at her aunt in some confusion. “Then I told him about Lydia and expected him to express his regrets and depart as soon as possible. Instead, he asked to call on Monday. I do not understand him at all. His features seemed hard, disdainful when I related the news but he asked to call. But he did not reject me. I do not understand.”
Her aunt looked at her and replied, “I think there is much more to that young man than you give him credit for, Lizzy. Could it be that he was thinking about Wickham's role? You must appreciate his feelings toward him. Now I must apprise your uncle of these circumstances. I am sure he will want to be here when Mr. Darcy calls on Monday. It was all I could do to get him to go to his office this morning. He was quite interested in your young man.”
“He is not my young man, Aunt!”
“I beg to differ, Lizzy. If he was not, he would have made polite excuses and you would never see him again.” With this, Mrs. Gardiner left to arrange lunch and send a note to her husband.
~~
Darcy returned to his house and began the process of discovering Lydia. He had determined on doing so during his ride home. Lord ______ was chairman of the organization which collected and disbursed funds to homes that assisted young women left destitute, unwed mothers and other distressed, unprotected young women. Darcy and his father had contributed to the organization for years. He should be able to get a list of the homes to which funds had been supplied. He had no idea how many such places existed, but, with the address and the name of the director of each, he would canvas them all, though it could take some time. A note to Lord _____ was quickly drafted and given to a footman to deliver.
That task completed, he considered calling on Mrs. Younge, but it was now too late for that. He would call on her tomorrow. For now, he would have to consider how he could be in Elizabeth’s company other than calling on the Gardiners.
His mind then turned to how he would conduct the search. Secrecy was necessary. No one could know for whom he was searching nor, if he found her, could Lydia’s presence be known. He would have to secrete her here at Darcy House. As his thoughts continued along these lines, they gradually became focused on Elizabeth. His desire, his need for her, was unabated. Lydia must be recovered, else it might be a year or more before he could pursue her and would she be willing to wait after he had treated her so abominably?
Thanks to Alida for her great Beta work.